Edging is the art of being sexually aroused to the brink of orgasm but halting stimulation just before the actual release. By doing this repeatedly the pleasure sensations build and build making the final glorious climax a stronger and more satisfying experience.
The key is to stop at the perfect point so that you’re constantly ‘on the edge’ of orgasm, teasing for as long as you can before finally letting go.
Edging can be a solo pursuit through delaying orgasm during masturbation. You may do it already without having heard of the term. It can simply feel natural and lovely to keep riding that wave of almost pleasure then when the release finally comes, the orgasm is much more intense than a regular climax.
If you know your body too well, masturbation can sometimes be over very quickly and that can be quite frustrating in itself. Of course, occasionally, all we want or need is a quick release to see us through the day—but sometimes, taking our time and enjoying the ride is heavenly. Edging can be a great way to achieve a longer, more satisfying, masturbation session.
Edging, or surfing, really is like riding a wave of bliss over and over again. The plateau stage can last for a very long time; your body in a state of suspended pleasure for as long as you can take it. Indeed, this plateau has been used in other practises like Tantra to build the energy flow and heighten the spiritual experience.
Seduce Yourself – If you haven’t tried edging before but think it sounds great and you’d like to try, take it slowly. Make sure you have enough time and space to explore the experience. How do you get in yourself in the mood? Make a date with yourself in the evening and think about it as you go about your day. Maybe wear some nice lingerie or none at all so you have a little reminder of what’s in store later. How about lovely scented bath reading some erotica or watch some delicious porn. By really turning things on before you even touch yourself, you’ll be ready to fully indulge in your self-pleasure.
Edging and Sex Toys – Using sex toys may bring you to the brink of your climax more quickly than doing it by hand and with edging, there can be advantages to this. If it takes you a long time to achieve orgasm through manual stimulation alone, the lure of that flighty moment may be too much to bear; you might not want to waste the delicious trip over into orgasm and give in to the pleasure. That’s the trickiest bit about edging, being able to stop when everything in your body and soul is saying GO GO GO!
If you bring yourself close in a flurry of sex toy vibrations quite quickly, then it might be easier to back off rather than give in to the quickie climax. Your clit (or cock) will thank you for it! Once you’ve stopped twitching and your breathing has slowed a little, reapply your best technique or toy to your pleasure zone. Riding the crest of that wave over can be a truly exciting experience. Heightened blood flow to the genitals increases sensitivity and every nerve starts to tingle, craving that release, your body and soul crying out for it. But you, you meanie, you stop, gasping and curling in on yourself, fearful you might not be able to climb back up to those heights. You will, and you will get a little higher each time. It does take patience, but once you have it, your skills and expertise are totally transferable to partnered situations.
Edging With a Partner – In partnered sex, it may be a little trickier to achieve the perfect point of stopping before the moment of no return. You will need to be very good at reading your partner’s orgasm clues.
Trust and being mindful of your partner’s responses and backing off just before release can take some time and can develop a real feeling of intimacy. Imagine the frustration of having to endure an almost ruined orgasm, only to be rewarded with the most body shaking climaxes of all. If you go a little too far with your stimulation and stop just that split second too late, you can end up with a rather disappointing weak orgasm, or unintentional climax that then, because of all the build-up, over stimulation that puts you off. Take a break and try again later.
Ask your partner to tell you when they are close, learning to spot which physical reactions go along with their instruction. To find the correct tipping point is a bit of an art. Do they go silent, does a particular part of their body twitch? Do they start groaning or writhing slightly, you’ll have to keep a close eye and use those signals to push that tiniest bit further each time, watching as they ride and plateau again and again at your hand.
Edging can be particularly fun if the edgee is restrained and at the mercy of the edger (the person administering the pleasure). Taking the person to that delicious brink and bringing out a raw pleasure and desperation for release, can be truly satisfying for both (or more) parties. To be on the giving end of an edging session, delivering for some, what could be the most intense orgasmic experience they’ve had is a wonderful gift. And to be on the receiving end of that pleasure? Well, let’s just say all the things, mind-blowing, toe-curling deep satisfaction.
Communication is key as with all sexual techniques, if you know what each other enjoys, you are much more informed when it comes to trying out new things together.
Whether you try edge play alone or with others, it’s a wonderful tool to have in your sexual armoury—especially if you have the luxury of a little more time than usual to explore your body and fantasies.
Give it a try—I’m sure you won’t be disappointed by the end result!